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January 08, 2007

Foot in Mouth

Golden_girlsA quick post because I've got wine on board, having too much fun, and I totally threatened to do this.

After Bunko tonight, my friend Diana and I went to IHOP. I know kids... I live the sweet life... It's not for everyone.

So my stomach was just really upset and I said to Diana, "I wish I was like an old lady and had Tums in my purse".

She pulled a baggie full of Tums out of her purse and flung it at me. Then I laughed like I was 14 and stoned for the first time. Oh, good times.

That's all I got.

Please don't yell at me if you carry Tums in your purse. (see post title)

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I keep them in my glove department and should anyone find them, they are my "uncle's".

Well, now I am out of tums-closet.

There has been many a time when I wished I had the sense to carry some sort of antacid onhand. Of course, being a guy that'd be just one more thing to carry around in my pockets and they're already too full of junk.

I wish I'd kept them on me while pregnant-- they really come in handy then.

Vive les Tums!

Rocky J,

That is an excellent cover.


That's kind of funny reeminds me of a conversation I had with a guy who clearly needed a briefcase but refused to carry one.

Madame M.

Ya know, I carry other junk in my purse I never use, but Gawd forbid I have tums, something I might actually use.


Man, someone needs to formulate TUMS antacid "for the life that gives you heartburn". Actually I think they already might, isn't it called valium?

Actually TUMS isn't very O.G.(Original Grandma) but taking the extra packs of crackers from the bread backet at the diner, now there you go, that's O.G.

I have tums in my office desk drawer. So I guess that makes me old. But although I may be old, at least I have an on-hand remedy for heart-burn. So I've got that going for me.

Not Tums, but I have hard candy, gum, tissues, various hair clips, bands, doo-dads, Band-Aids and lip gloss. The hard candy brings me dangerously close to old lady status.

I think Tums are just as essential as say, Excedrin. I also feel one of the most comforting things to know in your life is that you have back-up, whether it be a good friend or a bottle of tums after dinner.
The problem with Tums is, it's treating the symptom and will make you old. The real problem is not enough acid or digestive enzymes and your food is backing up your pipes! If you took a multiple digestive enzyme when you eat,(found cheap at Walmart) and waited at least 5 hours between your first meal and the next befor putting ANYTHING except water in your mouth, then you would never have, "excess acid" and never need Tums and thus never develop Alzheimers from all of the Aluminum you are consuming in the Tums! They are bad bad bad for you! If you go to the Tums website they claim its not true but read the wording carefully, they say things like, "not proven" etc. And now you know so you can't ever say I didn't warn you. (sigh, nobody will listen to this)

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